Bewitched?

I am blogging from my hometown in India and I am away on my soulful vacation. Yet, my angst continues to haunt me and here I am again, compelled to write. AAh. Such are the woes.
On a high note, I also observed the radical change that India has gone through in the past few years. A lot of people from all over the country have moved to the bigger cities in search of newer opportunities and better jobs. And the influx of the new crowd and fresh faces has radically changed the mindset of these cities. Young people revel in their new found confidence and expression. Before I digress and begin sounding like a political blogger, I should revert back to my original demonic self.
One of the things that has'nt changed is the giant impact that our film industry seems to have on our every day life - the style, the food, the vernacular continue to be strongly influenced by bollywood, tollywood, mollywood and the like. Or has it always been the other way round. I have never really figured it out.
As I was walking in another of the metropolis's hubs for young people, I watched what I thought was a genie walking right past me. This little 5 ft nothing girl, was walking in around in 'I dream of Genie' pants and a little tshirt on top. She seemed perfectly at ease in it. So much so, that I had to recheck my surroundings and make sure that I hadnt suddenly been transported into Aladdin's Arabia. Okay, I exaggerate. But, I was appalled nevertheless. Having attitude and confidence is one thing. Looking stupid and over confident is another. My dear sister explained to me that its been one of our up and coming heroines in some recent bollywood flick. Hence the pervasion of this hideous monstrosity on the streets of Hyderabad.
Its alright to ape and imitate something that your screen idols have worn, but perhaps its a good citizen's responsibility to check themselves in the mirror before they go out into the world to shock hapless victims.

the boy man

Been long folks. I havent been travelling at all these past few weeks. A few odd trips in California dont count.
I figured I 'd dig deep through the annals of my dark mind and ferret out some fashion faux-pas that I had stored away. So here goes.
A long time ago, I was flying out early spring from the East Coast back to CA. The flight had been delayed and after a week of working hard I was eager to get back home. I was pretty oblivious to my surroundings and was wallowing in my own self-pity. The air was nippy and so everybody was dressed in semi-summery clothes with maybe a jacket and a sweater. I noticed this boy-man walking past me several times. I use the phrase boy-man loosely here..he was probably about 30 years old but looked more of a boy and less a man.
He caught my attention because he wasnt very tall(about 5ft 5 in), and he was standing next to this youngish woman who was pregnant. It was an odd match. She looked big and heavy and he looked rather tiny. Added to that was another of my pet peeves. He was wearing a formal icy blue shirt with a pair of beige cargo shorts. And the best part - he had a sweater over his shoulders with a knot in the front. A la Jack Mc farland from Will and Grace. Dont get me wrong, its not the fact that he looked gay that got me.
It reminded me of a guy I knew a loooong time ago. The second time I met him, he was dressed in a formal shirt and little short shorts(yeah, they make them for men too apparently)..and I remember teasing him endlessly about it back then. In fact I took him to a store and made him buy a tshirt then and there.
But that was a past life. These days I am a little more grumpy and dont have the energy to hoot my fashion horn.
Please people..especially men below 40..please heed to this blogger's advice and look around u before u go abt tying ur sweaters in the front and wearing super formal shirts on your cargo shorts!

Le scrunch crunch

I have been meaning to write for a while now. Just running out of breath. Been so busy. I need a vacation.
My dear anonymous friend posed an interesting question that got me thinking. As people get older and older, why do they seem to slowly wither away. Their sense of style becomes drier and more sober. Perhaps, age and experience just sober you up. Or perhaps its just the nature of life. They go through the four seasons. It certainly got me thinking.
As I was flying a few weeks ago from Kansas city, (sidenote:which has the easiest airport I have been to till date), I boarded into a relatively small airplane. It was one of those planes where there are only two seats on either side. It was pretty entertaining as well. It had two, very nice ladies as stewardesses. They were particularly funny and super friendly. Interestingly they were probably in their mid to late 50s. They hadnt lost the chutzpah to life. And it was a delight to watch them. Reminded me of the Golden Girls(yeah, I watch that show)
Although, I was completely entertained, I made a mental not to self to write abt a fashion peeve that had briefly escaped my attention. One of the golden ladies had tied her blonde hair into a high pony tail with a black velvet scrunchie. To add to that, there was the gold ear rings and bright red lipstick. Instinctively, I had the reaction one has, when you scratch a blackboard with your finger nails. I quickly forgave herthough, given her pleasant attitude and demenaour.
But please people, scrunchies have been long out! I dont even know where one can buy them these days. But if you do find them somewhere, stay away and spare the rest of the poor souls like me please!

New York, New York

Ola folks..I just returned from spending an exhilirating weekend in the fashion capital of the world - atleast my little world - New York City. Every sidewalk was a runway. People strutting their stuff on 5th avenue. A Carrie Bradshaw at every headturn. People struggling to exhibit their uniqueness in every sense. The week before I spent it in Gaithersburg, Maryland which is like any other suburb(yawn!) in the United States. The contrast between the two places was rather hard-hitting. Interestingly enough it was pretty ironic as well.

I was getting a croissant for breakfast at a little bakery around the corner when in walked the fashionista - a skinny, asian girl. pretty, in her mid-20s. Wearing cute shorts and a tshirt. Perfect for the hot-humid weather. Until I saw what she was wearing on her feet. She was wearing furry ugg-boots. In the middle of sweltering humidity and a 100 degrees, wearing ugg-boots with short shorts was not chic, it was geographically out of place. An interesting thought did cross my mind. I have been writing about how people are time displaced and seem to be in a time capsule. For the first time, I was witnessing a woman who lived in two hemispheres at once. OR maybe she thought wearing furry thick boots and shorts made her legs look skinnier.

Immediately I thought of this woman I saw in Gaithersburg, the previous week. She was a female gardener mowing the lawn and clearing out weeds. She was a latina woman in her mid-20s. She was dirty and covered in mud. But she looked like she had walked straight out of a fashion magazine. She was wearing beige pants with a dirty off-white shirt. She had rolled her sleeves to right above her elbows and was wearing a brown leather belt across her waist. Even under the dirt that she was covered in, she managed to look super stylish. As I said before it was pretty ironic. Style transcends boundaries.

I spotted this outside a salon while I was in Oregon last week! (pic taken from my phone) Brought a big smile to my face.. Enjoy!

Kramerica anyone?

I have been busy and lazy with my life. Sometimes you just drift and things just seem to be happening around you. Its like you took a remote control, hit pause and hit play again. Your life seems unchanged. Although real life around you seems to say something different. Before I digress, back to my usual venting.
I was travelling on the local train in Portland, Oregon to visit a local brewery when I came across my long forgotten woe. Portland is a beautiful city, scenic and modern and also very crowded. The train system seems to be rather excellent and is the main choice of transport for working people who worked outside the city.
As my colleagues and I settled in the comfort of our comfortable albeit unfamiliar surroundings(we love our cars), I was watching this young man who had just boarded the train. He was wearing formal work-clothes which suited him well. Sadly though, the moment he sat down, it hit me about what was wrong! The trousers were a little too short..just about half an inch or so shorter than his cuffs. And as he sat down and his pants went up, I could see glaring portions of his socks! It instantly reminded me of the character Kramer in Seinfeld. Kramer is seen in almost all episodes of Seinfeld wearing these ridiculous trousers. It adds an extra zing to his already quirky character and makes him what he is. But the rest of us are not lucky enough to make ourselves rich by wearing funny looking pants and still gather iconic status!
A dear friend of mine was recently telling me about how tricky it is to get tailor made clothes in the United States. We are surrounded by chains and chains of stores and nobody caters to a certain body style anymore. But some brands fit better than others, and perhaps its wise to take a moment and get simple things like the length of the pants straightened out, especially when they are formal work-pants. I wish them success in their quest!

Wash,rinse,repeat(the re-cycle)

Last week has been interesting. I gotta chance to go to the "City of Love" to attend a fashion show. Really loved the show and thought some of the creations were pretty interesting. Will upload pics from the show a little later. The show was put together by students of fashion. The things they had learnt in their four year program from fabric making to dress design. Haute Couture. The works.
Needless to add, the crowd lived upto the fashion show. People all ages showed up in all sorts of fashion. From accessories to shoes to clothes to hats. Each in its own telling a little about their personality and perhaps their attitude. I was in absolute heaven. It was the best couple of hours I had spent in a long while.
Retro chic was largely "in". Polka dots, greta-garbo hats, headbands, scarves, hepburn-style pants, big super-size-sunglasses, big colorful prints, dobby-pants for men and women and the like. Suddenly I was transported back into the 60s again. Talk about recycling. Admittedly though, the clothes did look uber chic.
In the midst of all this creativity though was one person that stuck out like a sore thumb. The director of the fashion school! A woman about 45-50 years of age dressed in an ill-fitted suit with shoulder pads!!!! And the clincher - bold gold jewellery! As she stood there making the opening speech, I was cringing in pain. From what I had heard she was supposedly very wealthy and you could tell she had a sense of power and command. Whatever it was it didnt show from what she was wearing. Maybe she was trying to make up for the balance in this world. Or maybe she was a little ahead of her times..If people are going back to the 60s in their sense of style, maybe she just went back to the 80s when shoulder pads and gold jewelry was in!! Whatever it was, it wasnt working!

I have a confession to make. Blogging against fashion-peeves has been therapeutic. Lately, I have noticed that I am not giving people a mental makeover as I meet them. In fact, I dont have the same anguish, I am slowly drifting into a bit of complacency as I become more forgiving of the violators.
As my dear anonymous friend commented on my last blog, I could really use a makeover myself and become a fashion cop. So I decided to wear my pink fashion police hat (an homage to 'legally blonde') and carry my shrill whistle and walk the country looking for violators. Sadly enough, it can only be wishful thinking as I still have my day job to keep! Still, I have two incidents to report as I went through the vagaries of my every day life.

I went to the optometrist the other day to finalize my contact lens prescription. This bitchy female doctor is there to welcome(how ironical) me and find out how comfortable I was with the prescription. I should have known she was bitchy right from when I saw her. The white coat threw me off briefly. As I was leaving the store, after having a violent moment with her, I noticed what she was wearing. She was wearing all black clothes(black top, black pants) and shiny red open-toed pumps. I figured the only thing she needed was a pair of horns and she would be ready for a halloween party.

Next, I was at the airport leaving Baltimore to travel to Los Angeles recently. It was a beautiful sunny day, about 75 degrees. It was going to be a long flight about 5 hours. People were in their summer best - shorts, capris and the like. As the flight continued to board though, I was looking for my shrill fashion-cop-whistle...so I could flag this couple down. The woman was about 33 and the man was around 35. They seemed very cosy, chic and ready. Ready to go skiing that is! They were both dressed from head to toe as if they were out on their yearly trip to Aspen. They would jump of the plane and ski away onto the diamond slopes. I couldnt understand what was going on. And this is spring for Pete's sake!

Welcome to hookerville!

I have been travelling in and out of Northern California these days. My long travels across the country seemed to have temporarily stopped!(phew!)
For the kind of work I do, I rarely get to see my fellow team members. So it was a nice change to be in our Nor Cal office and I got to "hang" with a few of them. I work for an hardware engineering firm and as most of you probably are well aware we, engineers amongst other things, severely lack any sense of fashion. Rightly so, I guess. Our mind works in different dimensions and we rarely have a problem with it. We fall in love, marry and breed our kind. so we pass this legacy of lack of keen sartorial appeal to our generations to come!
I am not complaining, mind you. I am just observing.
I ran into one of our young project managers who had been away for the good part of the year on maternity leave. I have chatted with her before, and I somehow never seem to elicit enough (intelligent) responses from her to be able to carry on a conversation beyond 30 sec.
For some reason, on this ominous day(you will know why it was ominous in a few), she decided to show up at work in hot pink pants and a low cut black blouse! I immediately went to a stage of 'fashionaphylactic' shock and started jabbering away with her to cover my involuntary reaction.
Maybe she decided that she need to make a statement and let people know she was back in town! and needed to do it with some sense of panache! whatever it was, she succeeded in getting my attention.
But the strange thing is - that given that we are engineers, and the larger portion of the population consists of men, it probably went unnoticed!

Peeping Tom!

Down, down, down..Alice fell into the rabbit hole without ever thinking how she will get back again. She saw a little door and was curious to find out what was behind it. It was locked. She looked around and found a key on the table. She unlocked the door and could see great beautiful gardens and many wonderful things. But she was too big to fit into the door.
Alice in Wonderland was wonderful. I am seeking inspiration from Lewis Caroll to use euphemisms to write my next blog!
Euphemisms, because I am trying to be subtle about it and dont have the gall to write explicitly. Women wearing pant suits was considered a big step for feminism. 'Nice' women wore skirts and blouses and that was that.
Times have changed and so has the mentality. In keeping with wearing 'formal' clothing at work, many women wear formal shirts along with their/skirts or trousers. The shirts, however, being not so friendly to the women's body, fit them like they would fit men. Things have gotten a little better. Nowadays, shirts have curves and waists. But, some women are better endowed than others and they leave a peeping hole between their second and third buttons because it doesnt fit perfectly!
Ladies, my only suggestion is that please correct what I can deem only as an honest mistake. Its not in the least bit sexy to have a peeping hole! So the next time you are out doing your power shopping, I would suggest that you definitely take steps to ward off any peeping toms!

doughnuts are made of (w)holes!

Atoms form molecules. Molecules form matter. and so on and so forth. This has been the nature of life. The point I am trying to make with this analogy is that ultimately the idea of a "whole" is our truth. No, I have not gone bonkers. I am not trying to get into metaphysics or have become deeply philosophical. In a minute you will understand where I am trying to go with this.
There are people of course who choose to defy this absolute banal truth and pretend as if it never existed at all!
These are the people who you see, men and women walking in a mall/airport/street, without any clue that they are defying science! They behave as if their upper half of the body and their low half of the body belonged to two different people. Human beings are not always the perfect 10 models. They dont grow proportionately wide everywhere. some have convex curves and some none at all. Some are top heavy, and some are bottom heavy. Some gain fat and have huge girths.
However, if you walk into a mall, the bottom heavy ones will buy size 10 jeans and buy a Size 'small' for the top! its as if they would rather believe that as long as they are able to fit into the 'small' top..there is hope in this world..some day you will be able to buy those size 2 jeans to go with your small top! Until that day however, please try and apply the norms of metaphysics to your sense of fashion!